I had every intention of writing a fluffy pre-Easter post about our egg dying, preparations for the Easter Bunny and the gorgeous weather we are having around here.
Do you ever have days where you feel like a failure as a mother? Today was one of those days. It had some good moments, but mostly I was short on patience and snappy. I have an annoying, achy cold and about a million things to get done. I feel terrible admitting it, but the kids just felt in my way all day. I really needed Gloppy to take a nap and he was not having it today. I was pissed. I feel like I spent the entire day in the kitchen either cooking something or cleaning something up and my body aches.
I've been trying to suck it up and just make it through the day. The kids were bored and antsy for most of the day and I was counting the minutes until bedtime. We put some carrots and a glass of water out for the Easter Bunny and after about fifty warnings to watch out for the water, Lolly knocked it over. Mr. Mint lost his cool and I decided it was time to get the kids upstairs and in their beds. As I was walking out of the girls room, Frostine asked me where her lamby was. I snapped at her that she needs to keep to track of her own damn stuffed animals and I had no idea where the heck it was. Then Lolly (imitating my nasty tone) asked me to leave the door cracked a little. I completely snapped at her not to talk to me that way and she burst into tears. I felt like the crappiest mother on the planet and a hypocrite.
I am just so damned tired and I have so much more to do before I can crawl into bed. Hopefully I will be resurrected tomorrow (Easter Sunday) as a new kind of mother. Because today I feel like I failed my kids.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
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