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Wednesday, November 5, 2008

How To Be a Bad Mom and The Obvious

How to be a bad mom:

When you pick up your daughters from school, notice one of them is beside herself with joy at the library book she picked up at book borrowing.  She is practically hugging it.  

You agree it looks like a great book and we need something new to read before bedtime.

When you get home, notice your daughter carrying the book with her everywhere she goes.  She checks the bookmark position, reads the title, checks the bookmark position again.

Go about the rest of your day.  Help the first graders with their homework.  Take all the kids to the park to ride bikes until it starts to get dark.  Enjoy the crisp fall afternoon and wish you had a soy latte to warm you up as you watch your kids play.   Forgive your husband for telling you he will be working late and won't be home for dinner/bedtime.  Make dinner and enjoy make you own taco night with the kids.   

Let the kids watch Arthur while you empty the dishwasher so you can load the dishwasher with all the make you own taco dishes.   Clean out the lunchboxes and start lunches for tomorrow.

Give all three kids a bath and wash their hair.

Help everyone brush their teeth and comb their hair.

Change into your pajamas and settle in for story time.

Notice the panicked look on your book loving daughter's face when she realizes she doesn't have her beloved book.

Tell her to go downstairs and look for it.

Try to contain your frustration when she comes back upstairs in tears because she can't find it.  You just want to read a couple of books and tuck them all into bed before you collapse.

She is having none of your other book suggestions and when you suggest we read her beloved book tomorrow she only cries harder.

Don't hide your frustration from her while you both head back downstairs to look for the book.  Look everywhere.  Make her go out to the car and search there.  Tell her she really needs to learn to keep track of her things and this is ridiculous.

When you can't find the book, tell all the kids that we have now wasted story time looking for the darn book and the all need to just go to bed.  Two of them will start crying and saying it isn't fair.

Finally get them tucked in walk downstairs to finish cleaning up.   Feel like crap for yelling at your distraught daughter and canceling story time.

Spot the book on the edge of the dining room table about a half hour later.

Bring the book up to your daughter and find that she's still awake.  

She's overjoyed that you found the book and puts it under her pillow.  You hug her and tell her you love her and she's a good girl.

As you walk out the door, she tells you you're a good mommy.  

Your heart will melt and you'll feel even worse for getting angry at her.  

Go downstairs and write a blog post about it.  Realize even good moms act like bad moms sometimes and isn't forgiveness fantastic.  

The Obvious

I've been reading a lot of political posts.  A lot.  Lots of people have created much better commentary than I could.  I voted.  I have had numerous conversations with my six year olds about the election and what it all means.  I was truly disappointed that Prop 8 passed (click here for an excellent post) here in California, yet happy that Prop 4 did not pass. 

This morning we were talking about how important and historical this election was and how I always want them to remember the day America elected a black man into the White House, and I found myself crying.  I'm hopeful.

This post here says what I am feeling better than I could.  Go and read it and pretend I wrote it.  Just kidding.  About pretending I wrote it, not about reading it.  What are you waiting for?  Go.


Kate Coveny Hood said...

I have enjoyed reading all of those posts as well! And now I can add yours to the lsit. I resolved to not write anything political and even decided to forgo the post election post... I have a number of people in my life that hold different views and it just seemed best for me to keep those discussions private. And it's no big loss since I've found that others have stated my feelings and opinions so much better than I could have hoped to do! And I've been able to get my "yeah - that's right, well said!" sentiments in as a commenter. I enjoyed your Bad Mom/Good Mom story. Who can't relate to that?!?

Andrea's Sweet Life said...

Oh my, I have been right there in your shoes. But I think the BEST moms are the ones who admit they were wrong!

Thanks for the linkage - mine, and the others I clicked over and read!

Sophie, Inzaburbs said...

All I could do was smile and nod :-)

Maura said...

And where's the bad mom part? Sorry, sounded like you were just human from my vantage point. :-)

I, too, have "elected" to skip a post-election post because people like those have done such a great job of capturing my feelings on it. I was in a complete Prop 8 funk yesterday but I'm moving past it to the next stage in the fight on that.

Melissa said...

Thanks for the shoutout! :)

And I've done that, too. But mine is usually with a lovey or something like that. Always makes me feel about two inches tall.

Anonymous said...

i am still thinking and saying, " RON PAUL WRITE-IN!!!"

PsychMamma said...

I think we all have days like that. Don't beat yourself up. I always find it amazing how quick kids are to forgive and forget. That unconditional love is an amazing thing. :-)

bernthis said...

If you are a bad mom than so am I. I know that feeling of regret that you get upset but when it's just you (and for me, it is, I'm a single parent) I have to remind myself, I am human and so are you.